Saturday, July 4, 2009

Sarah Palin Quit Because...

10. She's moving to the lower 48 because Alaska is just too far from Glenn Beck.

9. After 30 months as governor, she's cracking under the stress of protecting the U.S. from Russia.

8. She doesn't want her tenure as governor to overshadow her experience as mayor of Wasilla.

7. She wants some time off to go hiking with Mark Sanford in the Appalachian.

6. The Alaska state legislature wasn't giving her time to go for her daily runs, and sweat is her sanity.

5. Trying to conceive triplet so she and Todd can replace Jon and Kate.

4. Because that's what Joe Vogler would have done.

3. Maybe she was just jealous of all the attention Michael Jackson is getting.

2. She's decided to run for President... Of Alaska.

1. There's another shoe left to drop.

Happy 4th of July!